i'll leave when the wind blow....

its been few days since i'm writting something here...mcm2 nk tulis sebenrnya..tp x terjangkau dek fikiran aku..biar nukilan kenangan tu cuma ader dlm kotak hati & fikiran aku...i wanted to wite it down but..aku tak tau camner nak start..huhu...agaknya sebab letih sgt keje kot..

ckp pasal keje..everything was fine dgn keje and of cuz...bila dah keje angkat2 call especially when kena jwb call from australia & new zealand mmg complicated.. kalu setakat kena maki tu biasa la...kalu sehari tak kena perkataan "fucking bitch", "moron", "idiot"...haper lagi..." i wanted to talk to your supervisor, ur manager, ur director..." cam $#56%*&&^&* jer aku nk maki customer tu blk...but memikirkan aku cari rezeki...bwat bodo jer la...and last week memang aku tak tahan sgt...tensen...angin aku dok naik time tu..hormon tak stabil... perut aku pun ngh sakit...nk nngs jer raser...apa aku nk wat..nk lepaskan tensen...nk call mak abah aku.. hmmm..tak patut....nk call kawan2 aku..lagi tak leh..suma dok ader kelas..adik aku..ader kelas gak..sat dier kater aku tak betul lak..tepon dier....lastly, aku dail la gak no dier... mula2 takde saper angkat..so, i was like.. he never gonna ring me back..but then, elok kau nk balik gi ofis..he ring back...tuhan jerk yg tau betapa leganya kau time tu...dpt gak kau dgr suara dier...

alhamdullillah..his fine...glad to hear his voice...relief giler..dah puas sembang..(sbnrnya tak puas pun - nk sembang lagi)..continue my work....then go back home...at 4pm...and the next morning...call him again to asked about the celcom no..lega gak bila dia kater i can use my no back & and i msj him a tq note.... yup..really lega coz..tu jerk one and only kenangan yg ader...sooooooooo..saturday, cat umah...arrrgggghhh letih la..then gi makan sup ekor.."sup hamid" - the best sup in town kat penang ni...then sleep..

the next morning.....sunday..wake early..maleh giler, go to karnival sukan...ringan2kn klpa otak...at least tak tensen kan memikirkan masalah jiwa and otak...meet mama..she keep asking about him...i dunno what i suppossed to said............just diam jerk..just cakap dier chat..mama..suh kim salam kat dier lak...hmmm.. best gak lepak2 ngan anak2 buah..yg plg besh dapat jumpa badut "MR.B"..hahahaha...funny guys la MR.B ni... budak2 suma dpt belon sorang satu...and of cuz aku tak dapt belon la..

then..aku ingat tak nak la pikir pasal abg..then he call.."bby plz topup for me..abg ader masalah besar ni, tgh2 utan ni xde kedai tpup" bila pikir balik, saper suh keje kat tgh utan tu kan....then..i was really curious..aku ader wat salah per lak...pastu dier dier ckp...its all started with my sms yesterday morning.... ahhhh, great....aku gak yg salah..salah dier pun sama gak...ok.. both of us amitted we make the mistake... gud...mengaku pun dua2 org salah...and that evening....aku bercakap ngn dier thru phone for almost 1 hour..lama gak tuh...arrgggghhhhh.......really miss him....camner ni....??????

based on the conversation ari tu....one day, he gonna totally leave me...maybe i'm gonna totally leave him.. i dunno..but..slowly....kadang2 takdir tu tak terucap...ajal, maut, jodoh..ALLAH yg maha mengetahui...i'm gonna leave this world...i'll leave when the wind blow..take a breath and there it goes...i'll be outside of ur window..i'll pass but i'll go slow..I'LL LEAVE WHEN THE WIND BLOW.......